God's Screw Up
by Alpine992
Summary: Having died in his fight against Aizen, Ichigo finds himself before an Entity calling itself God saying he died because of his mistake, as recompense he'll send Ichigo to another world. "No Thanks, Send me to Soul Society" ... "Paperwork is already filled out... sorry." Forced to go to another World how will Ichigo manage to survive? Just how many Cheat Abilities does one guy need?


Here he stood after he had just died. It was his sacrifice to defeat Aizen that led him to be here.

Just him, and a God in front of his eyes. Nothing else. No ground under his feet. No sky above his head. No horizon. Nothing but the spectral form before him.

"Yo! You kind of died from my mistake!" Ichigo blinked at the sudden cheery confession of the deity. Ichigo couldn't very well be called a believer, after everything he had witnessed in Soul Society, it was slightly difficult to come to terms with what was happening right now, was this the steps people went to, to go to Soul Society he had only headed through the Senkaimon before, never actually died the proper way and been brought to the Rukongai. Not to mention the fact that this 'God' didn't really care that he had ended a life.

"You don't seem sorry." Ichigo scowled slightly, while he was pissed, he figured that this was probably some stupidity that the SSWA put in place to welcome new people to the Soul Society. He had never heard of going this way but he had never really asked either, did this 'God' character work for Soul Society or something. _"Probably isn't even a deity and has a payroll."_ Ichigo mentally added, it all just seemed really odd and that was right up SSWA's alley, it was probably either Rangiku's or Yachiru's idea.

"As an apology, I'll put you in a Fantasy World with swords, magic and stuff! You can have gold and power and even woman, anything goes really! I'm pretty nice, huh?" Ichigo blinked in confusion what the hell was this guy talking about, fantasy world? What about Soul Society?

"No thanks, just send me to Soul Society." Ichigo flat out told the 'deity' making the God pause momentarily. Ichigo rose an eyebrow, why was he pausing, it should be simple enough to do it was his damn job after all.

"Uh, just one minute." The spectral form spoke causing Ichigo's scowl to grow slightly as the being turned and began to move his hands at a rapid pace. "Sorry, Fantasy World it is." He stated turning back. "Paperwork's already been filled out, no turning back now." Ichigo's scowl turned downright deadly as he increased his glare and would have marched right up to this 'God' however couldn't move from the spot he was in. "Sorry." He offered.

"How about as your apology, you let me hit you as many times as I want and I'll stop after I feel better." Ichigo growled out at him. "Why the hell aren't you sending me to Soul Society!"

"T-That's above my paygrade." Before the Hero of the Winter War he was beginning to tremble slightly beneath the fierce gaze of the warrior. Ichigo growled once more raising his hand to the bridge of his nose and gripping it tightly, trying to calm himself down. Why couldn't he just go to Soul Society, even after he was dead he didn't have things simple.

"S-So, what do you want as your cheat power?" The God questioned. Ichigo sighed, he didn't want some kind of cheat power. Keigo was really into the Isekai genre lately and wouldn't shut up about them so Ichigo at least had a basic idea of what this God was talking about, who knew it'd happen to him, this whole other world business. Sighing lightly to himself as he looked up, nothing but blinding whiteness up there as well.

"My powers, I want my powers back." Ichigo told him, seventeen months and that's all he wanted in his life. Where he had once wanted to be normal like everyone else, that hadn't been the case.

"U-um."

"You're putting me into another world against my will and now you're telling me you can't give me my powers back?" Ichigo's demeanour grew dark making the deity panic slightly before shaking his head.

"No, not at all." The God rose his hands up in defence. "I'm just saying that you could have anything, is that all you really want?"

"Yes." Ichigo nodded as the God pondered this for a few moments, taking in the stature of the teen around him.

"Since I'm causing you so much trouble I'll do a bit more for you as well." Ichigo's body began to glow slightly making his eyes widened as his entire being felt odd, his muscles ached slightly causing him to groan. Ichigo gasped, his chest heaving slightly.

"What did you do to me!?" Ichigo growled, his glare once more fixed on the deity before him.

"I increased your age by ten years." Ichigo's eyes flew wide open at that. "Taking a look back through your life, you've never truly had romantic interactions with anyone." The deity began, still while Ichigo scowled the dust of red printed across his face, he didn't need to be reminded he had died a virgin here. "So, now that you're older and no longer have to worry about being young enough to enjoy such carnal desires I've increased your age. It's only natural for someone of your new age to engage in sexual events. Good Luck." The God offered a thumbs up in response to the former teens glare. Ichigo was going to kill this bastard! "Certain other aspects have been changed but I'll let you figure those out on your own." With a bow the Deity spoke his last words to Ichigo. "Please enjoy this raw, natural experience."

"...go to hell..."


End file.
